


Dreamers Stay Dreaming

by bbyfruit



Series: a color that doesn't exist [1]
Category: SKAM (TV)
Genre: Established Relationship, Fluff, Future Fic, M/M, Parenthood
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-30
Updated: 2018-10-21
Packaged: 2018-11-07 01:24:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 14,704
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11048382
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bbyfruit/pseuds/bbyfruit
Summary: “Isak?”“Yeah?”“I love you.”“Are you saying goodbye? Do you have to go?” Isak frowned.“No, not for a little bit. I was just reminding you,” Even said.OR: Isak and Even navigate love in all its complications - after ten years together, a daughter, and jobs that take them away from each other, but it's all good. It's all good.





	1. "This is going to sting."

**MONDAY, 17:52**

Isak was fucking tired. Not just normal tired, but bone tired, like his feet were sore and heavy, and even his goddamn teeth hurt, and he just wanted to fall into bed. He’d called Even from the lab to let him know that he was going to be late, of course, and he held out hope that maybe Even would have cooked dinner or something. He tried to squash it down. Expecting dinner was a shitty thing to do. Lilli had been sick that weekend, coughing and crying, so neither he nor Even were getting much sleep, and they didn’t get a chance to pick up groceries - fuck, he realized, they were out of milk. 

The door to their house supported his weight nicely while he kicked off his shoes.  

“Even?” he called, pulling the knob closed behind him and breathing in the familiar smell of  _ home _ . It was Even’s cologne and the laundry detergent they used, the faint scent of baby, something warm and loving and close to his heart that made him feel safe. 

“Kitchen,” Even yelled back, and Isak nearly cried when he saw the pizza on the table.

“Fuck, that looks so good,” he breathed, slumping into the chair across from Even.  

Even’s eyebrow crooked up.

“What?”

“You just said fuck in front of the baby,” Even said, gesturing to Lilli, who was sleeping in her highchair. Isak kind of wanted to be her. 

“Even. She’s asleep. Also, she’s six months old. She can’t understand shit,” Isak said, folding a piece of pizza into his mouth.

Gasping dramatically, Even covered Lilli’s ears, his hands almost reaching around her entire head, and Isak snorted in laughter.

“Don’t wake her up,” he told Even.

“Me? Was it me you were telling not to wake her up? You’re the one poisoning our child with your foul mouth,” Even said, mock affronted, eyes wide and his fingers just dusting his chest, and hell if this wasn’t a dream. Lilli sleeping near them, her breathing not audible but Isak  _ knew _ exactly how it sounded - he’d spent enough nights with his ear pressed up to the baby monitor. Even with his hair pushed back and a sweatshirt hanging off his limbs, that look in his eyes while he teased Isak, his whole body glowing like he was the only source of light in their little home, and Isak was overwhelmed by it all. 

“I promise not to swear around our daughter,” Isak said, wiping the grease from his fingers with a grin.

“Our daughter,” Even repeated, smiling at him sloppily, big and honest. Isak felt his heart swell in return.

“Our daughter.”

They watched her sleep until Isak suggested they put her to bed, and then they stood in the darkness and watched her sleep some more.

It was peaceful, the gentle music they played for her swaying around them, the light radiating softly from the nightlight in the corner, and Isak breathed happily. He leaned into Even’s side and let his eyes flutter closed. 

And then his phone started ringing.

“Fuck,” he said, shooting up, “fuck, fuck, fuck,” and Even was too distracted by Lilli crying to yell at him for swearing, and he waved Isak out of the room while he hushed their daughter.

“Jonas?” Isak said into the phone, without a second thought. Jonas had his own ringtone. 

“Bro,” Jonas began, “you will not believe who I just ran into.”

“This better be good,” Isak said, moving into the kitchen and starting to clean up dinner with his phone pinched between his shoulder and ear. “You woke up Lilli.”

“Oh, shit,” Jonas said, immediately concerned. “I’m so sorry. Is she feeling better? Do you need to go?”

“Nah, Even’s with her. He says she’s doing a lot better today.”

“Okay, good.”

There was a silence between them for a few beats.

“So, you were saying…” Isak prompted.

“Oh, yeah! Remember that kid that, like, stalked your Instagram? Julian something.”

Isak laughed incredulously. “Julian  _ Dahl _ ?”

“Yeah, that one. He’s at this concert I’m shooting right now.” 

“Fuck,” Isak said for what felt like the thousandth time that night, “I haven’t thought about him in forever.”

“I know, right? I kind of forgot he was a person. He looks damn good, though.”

“Wait, why are you calling me from a concert? Shouldn’t you be, like, running around taking three thousand pictures of the same drummer or some shit?” Isak teased. 

“No,” Jonas said, and Isak paused, because his best friend suddenly sounded just as tired as he felt. “I’m kind of drained, man. Like, I love taking pictures and this whole traveling thing is nice, but sometimes I just really want a solid life, you know? What you have with Even. Or, shit, I don’t know, maybe I just need to figure out how to be happy on my own.”

Isak took a moment to breathe. He could hear Even’s voice murmuring low from Lilli’s room, and he leaned against the counter and cradled his phone in his hands. 

“You’re always welcome here, you know,” Isak said slowly.

“Yeah. Thanks, man, I -” Jonas was interrupted by the start of another song, and he must have been close to the stage because the music was clashing in a way that didn’t sound quite right, as if it were just shy of coming together perfectly, too much bass. 

Isak winced at the change in volume and pulled the phone away from his ear. 

“Hey, Is,” Jonas said, starting to sound distant, his voice small through the line in a way it wasn’t before, drowning in the noise around him. 

“Yeah?”

“I’m gonna go. I love you, man. Lilli and Even too; give them my love.”

“Alright, I will. Love you too,” Isak said, but he thought Jonas had already hung up. He stared at his phone for a second.

“You good?” Even asked softly from the doorway, using that specific tone of voice he did when Isak was hurt or when he got a call from his dad, and Isak smiled at him to let him know that he was fine. 

“Yeah, it was just Jonas. Is Lilli asleep?”

“Yeah. She’s fucking cute,” Even said, coming up to Isak and wrapping him in a hug, the kind where they just stood and felt each other's heartbeats. 

“Don’t swear around the baby,” Isak said, muffled in Even’s neck. Even huffed a laugh into his hair.

Isak pulled his head back the tiniest amount. “Ev?”

“Yeah, babe?”

“I’m kind of worried about Jonas,” he admitted.

Even furrowed his eyebrows together and looked at Isak with cool eyes heavy with warmth before he asked, “Any reason?”

Shrugging, Isak leaned his legs against the table. “He sounded really tired and he’s just been working a lot still. Plus, he told me that he kind of wants a solid life.” 

“Okay,” Even said, resting next to him with their arms brushing together, and even after all these years, it still sent chills moving like lightning through Isak’s body. “You told him he could stay here?”

“Yeah, of course. But I feel like that might not be enough? Like, he’s been kind of a mess recently and I just want to help him.”

Even let out a deep exhale. “I don’t really know if there’s anything specific you can do. As long as he knows you love him and we’re here if he needs anything.” 

“Yeah,” Isak said again. He laced their fingers together, causing Even to smile as he marveled at just how well they fit. “I’ll call him tomorrow.”

Even nodded and tapped his thumb against Isak’s. “Wanna watch a movie?”

Isak pursed his lips, pretended to think. “Make out and then fall asleep on the couch?”

“Hell yeah,” Even grinned, and Isak was infinitely grateful for his life right now.

**TUESDAY, 6:05**  

Isak hated his life.  

There was still a full  _ hour _ left of sleep, but instead he was being awoken by Even’s phone ringing, default ringtone bouncing off their walls. Somehow, once they had Lilli, Isak was the one who became a light sleeper, every shift in her breathing pattern waking him up, while Even was able to sleep through it all.

“Babe,” Isak groaned, shoving his face in the pillow. “ _ Baby _ .”

No response. 

He reached his arm out and smacked Even’s bare chest. “Phone.”

“Hm?” Even murmured, so coated by sleep that he couldn’t even form full sentences, and Isak was jealous.

“Phone,” he said again, bitterly.

“Oh, shit.” Even didn’t bother to sit up, but instead just slid his phone open and let it rest on his ear. “Hello.”

They were close enough, Isak curled around Even in the bed, that Isak could clearly hear what Even’s assistant was saying. He just couldn’t really comprehend it.

“Can I call you back when I wake up?” Even asked, voice rumbling against Isak. “Why do they need an answer now?” 

Katrina was rambling on about how much they wanted Even for this film, something about money and time and  _ England _ , and Isak pressed his nose into the back of Even’s neck, because he knew what this meant. Even would be leaving soon, and he’d be left with a house of their wedding photos and Lilli’s nighttime antics and nobody to help him. He could handle it. He always had. Sometimes, though, it was hard, and he missed Even so fiercely that he felt like screaming seeing him through pixels on his laptop when they skyped.

“Yeah,” Even said blearily, “go ahead and tell them yes.” 

Isak sighed without meaning to.

Even hung up and rolled over to face him, knocking Isak’s nose with his own. 

“England?” Isak asked. He looped his arm behind Even’s neck and tangled his hand in his hair.

Even mumbled his acknowledgement into Isak’s skin. 

“Are you going to be okay?” Isak said, gently, everything softer in the morning light. 

“Yeah.” Even was drifting on the edges of depression, a little too dark around his eyes, and the past week had been so good, but Isak was always going to worry. He worried, but ultimately, he trusted Even, and so he nodded, pushing their noses back together, and whispered, “Okay.” 

**WEDNESDAY, 3:44**

Isak still couldn’t sleep sometimes. When he was younger, he had just assumed that it’d go away, once he figured his life out and everything fell into place. It never did. Having a baby, however, actually ended up helping him in the long run, because now, when his mind fell into spirals and his body was still but his eyes weren’t, he could pry himself out of bed and stand by Lilli’s crib. He could take his pointer finger and gently poke at her hand, marveling at the size difference. He could trace the curve of her ear. He could sync his breathing with hers, watch her chest rise and fall, watch her little eyes flutter. He could turn down the monitor and whisper things to her that nobody else knew.

“I’m so scared that I’m going to mess you up.”

“Your toenails are amazing.”

“I love you and your dad so much that I think I’m dying sometimes.”

“The idea of a God doesn’t seem so ridiculous anymore.”

And when Lilli herself couldn’t sleep, fussy and tearful with her hands balled in fists, Isak held her to his chest and told her all about whatever he was working on. 

“I know you don’t understand it yet,” he’d always begin, “but I wish you could see it, because the skin cells reacted so well to the treatment that I think we might be on the verge of a real breakthrough.” 

On nights like those, Lilli best slept pressed against Isak, so he’d sit in a chair and lay her on top of him while he read books with his daughter’s hair just lightly dusting his chin. 

**THURSDAY, 21:50**

It was another secret that was just between he and Lilli that each time Even left to work on a new film, Isak spent the first few nights curled up on the couch in Even’s clothes watching his older movies. Tonight, it was  _ The Mind Is Alone _ , and Lilli was babbling between his legs, propped up because although Even swore up and down that she was sitting up by herself the other day, Isak was still wary. 

He was just gearing up for a good cry at the end when his phone beeped.

**(Bro)nas:** Hey

What are you doing next week

**Issy K:** Work :/

**(Bro)nas:** Is that room still open for me? I’m in town again 

**Issy K:** Oh god please yes

Even left again and my only conversations have been about chemical compounds and baby food

**(Bro)nas:** Haha ok

I’ll let you know more later

Gotta go the gig’s starting

Jonas had spent their childhood pulling Isak through some pretty heavy shit. He’d been the one to tell Isak that he didn’t have to listen to the dickheads who made fun of him when they were little, the one to listen when Isak cried and said that he didn’t know what happened to his mom, the one who came over and made him dinner when his dad left. Jonas was the one who stepped in front of him during the Yakuza fights. He was the one who noticed when Isak wasn’t sleeping, when he fell in love with a boy, when he came out. He was Isak’s best man at the wedding. For the past twenty years, Jonas had been at his side through everything.  

When Jonas’s little sister died two years ago, Isak knew that it was his turn to be there for Jonas. He attended the funeral and watched Jonas stand stoic and cold next to the grave, the preacher speaking in flowery language, and Jonas looking past him without blinking. He fought off questions from family members and friends and acquaintances about Jonas’s absence as he threw himself into work, booking gigs, spending his nights taking pictures and editing them obsessively until he collapsed in bed.  

Isak hit Even’s number and Even picked up on the second ring.

“Hey.”

Isak relaxed minutely. “Hey. Where are you?” 

“Waiting at the airport,” and Even was cautious, hearing the restraint in Isak’s voice, “Why?” 

“Jonas,” Isak said. “I’m still worried about him but he said he’s going to come stay next week.”

“Oh, that’s good,” Even said, “maybe that means he’ll take a little break.”

“Nah, I doubt it. This is Jonas we’re talking about.”

“That’s true. You can try to get him to relax a little, though,” Even suggested, and Isak watched carefully as Lilli pushed herself closer to the toy beside her. 

“He’s not smoking weed around my kid.”

“Your kid?” Even asked jokingly. “What happened to our kid?” and if he were sitting next to Isak, he would have knocked their shoulders together. 

“You gave up parental rights as soon as you signed the contract to go film in England,” Isak said. He was joking, but as soon as he heard Even’s intake of breath on the other end of the line, he knew that he’d take it seriously.  

“You want me to come home?” Even asked quietly. 

“No, fuck, I was kidding,” Isak said immediately. “I’d never forgive myself if you gave up this job.” 

“You sure? It’s a lot, with work and Lilli and Jonas and your mom and me and everything,” Even said warily. Isak narrowed his eyes; Even was trying to make it sound overwhelming without pushing him too far. 

“Jonas and Eva are going to help with Lilli. Vilde too, now that she’s working there, I guess. And I can call Eskild if I want cuddles.”

Even laughed. “Good plan.” 

“Yeah.”

He listened to the bustle of the airport that layered through the phone around Even.

“Isak?”

“Yeah?”

“I love you.”

“Are you saying goodbye? Do you have to go?” Isak frowned.

“No, not for a little bit. I was just reminding you,” Even said.

“Oh,” Isak breathed. They’d been together for almost a decade and each time Even said he loved him, whether it was over the phone or while he was inside him or dropped with a kiss on the cheek while one of them ran out the door, each time Isak felt his heart beat faster like it was still new, like it was back on the day Even asked him to move in and told him for the first time. “I love you too.”

They were both silent. 

“Want me to tell you about the airport?” Even asked. 

“Yeah.” Isak rested himself deeper into the couch.

“Okay,” Even said in the low tone that was just for Isak, “the colors are really nice. All blues and whites, so it must look even better in natural light. There’s an old white guy across from me and he’s dressed all in black, and the contrast against the wall is so good, and he’s sitting between these two signs…” 

Isak drifted off with Even’s voice wrapped around his head. 

 **FRIDAY, 10:04**  

Isak was stretching when he got the text. 

 **Eva☀️:** Hiiiii, what are you doing right now? 

**Isak:** Working

Why is Lilli okay

**Eva☀️:** She’s still coughing and I think she has a tiny tiny fever 

Isak frowned at his phone. Eva was definitely playing it down, but he couldn’t figure out if it was because she didn’t want him to run out of the medical research lab or because Lilli was much sicker than a tiny, tiny fever

**Eva☀️:** My boss wants you to come pick her up so I said I’d text you 

Yeah, he thought, if she had to be picked up, then it was pretty bad.  

**Isak:** Fuck okay

Idk what to do if I can’t leave but I’ll let you know

He ran his fingers through his hair, pushing the curls around his temples down. Jesus.

Isak hit the door twice with the edge of his knuckles, much harsher than he was anticipating, and he winced for a half a second before he heard the sigh behind the door.  

“Come in,” Mona said tiredly. Isak stepped into his boss’s office. Mona was always thin and wired on caffeine, her eyes always too wide, slightly watery from all the focus on her computer screen as she frowned at the numbers that scrolled across it.

“Everything okay?” she asked.

“Uh,” Isak coughed, twice, “do you need me for the rest of the day? My daughter is sick.” 

“Okay. Is there anything you can do at home?”

Isak blinked. “I… I can analyze some of the data tonight.”

Mona nodded a few times, hitting a single spot on the keyboard multiple times before she finally looked up to see him. 

“It’s fine, Isak. We just can’t get too far behind on this project, so email me, yeah?”

“Of course,” he said and shuffled out of the room. He’d honestly expected more of a fight from her, something about him letting down the team or some shit.  

“Hope your kid feels better,” Mona called right before the door closed. He peeked around the doorframe - she was pinching the bridge of her nose and breathing through her mouth.

“Thank you,” he said quietly, and then hauled ass to scoop up his laptop and head out to his car.

When he reached the front desk, it was Vilde who greeted him, all tooth in her smile and Isak had to resist the urge to roll his eyes. 

“Isak! Are you here to get Lilli?”

“Yeah,” he said, resting his arms on the counter and biting back the sharp reply on the tip of his tongue. There was something about Vilde that just  _ irked  _ him to no end, made him exhausted after thirty seconds of conversation. He had no fucking clue how Eva and Sana ever managed to be friends with her. He knew as well as anyone about her problems, ever since that one time in their third year, but, God, he couldn’t very well give her a free pass for being annoying just because of it.

“Okay, sign here and then nurse’s office down the hall on the left,” she said professionally. Isak scribbled his name without thinking, because -  _ nurse’s office _ . Shit, how sick was she?

He put his shoulder in the door, steadying himself before he opened it, and then entered the room. There was a toddler in tears with a skinned knee sitting in a chair. The nurse was kneeling before him, saying, “This is going to sting,” and Isak cleared his throat.

“Hi,” he said when the nurse turned her head. “I’m Lilli’s dad? Isak Valtersen?” 

The nurse stared at him blankly for a second before her face cleared with recognition. “Oh! Lilli Bech Næsheim?” 

Isak scrunched up his nose. He knew this was going to be a problem, but Even had made a good case ( _ “She’s got your genes, Isak, it only makes sense that she gets my name!” _ ). Plus, how many sick Lillis did they have here? Shouldn’t she know who he meant? If she didn’t even know the kids, then was this really a good place for Lilli? 

He shook himself out of his head when the nurse pointed to a crib in the corner. 

“She’s been to the doctor recently?” the nurse asked while the toddler wailed. “Shh, it’s okay, just for a second.”

“Yeah, we took her last week,” Isak said, staring down at his daughter, fussy and wiggling against her back, fists waving. She’d been fine last night, he thought. Did he miss something?” 

“I’d recommend taking her again if she still has a fever in twenty-four hours.” She slapped a bandaid on the kid’s leg and he gave a little smile. “All better,” she told him.

“Okay,” Isak said quietly, reaching out and lifting Lilli to his chest in her favorite spot, cupping his hand behind her head and bouncing on his feet a little. He wasn’t sure if the bouncing was meant to soothe Lilli or himself.

She was warm against his palm. A little too warm, he realized, and he held her as close as he could without breaking her, because she was still so fucking tiny and his heart was aching when she sniffled, and he just wanted to crack open his chest and put her inside and keep her safe.

He brought her to the car and buckled her in, pulling a blanket from the backpack they used for her, tucking it securely behind her little shoulders. She squirmed and he kissed her head.  

Isak loved his job, loved the research and the details and the feeling of  _ finally  _ getting something right, but fuck, he loved Lilli way more, and so he spent the next hours sitting in her room with his laptop open but his attention fully on his daughter.


	2. "I don't need you."

  **SATURDAY, 10:19**

 “I think she’s feeling a lot better,” Isak said to his laptop, “but, like, I thought that yesterday too. So I don’t know.”

“Is she still sneezing?” Even asked.

Isak was in the kitchen with Lilli on his hip, his laptop sitting on the counter and displaying a sleepy Even, still in his hotel bed even though he was only an hour behind them.

“Kind of,” Isak said, tilting back so he could make a face at Lilli. “That thing Vilde and Eva brought over helped.”

Even shifted against his pillow. “Don’t burn the pancakes,” he warned. 

Isak shot him a look. “They’re _not_ going to burn, Even. I can successfully make breakfast without you.”

“Yeah, okay,” Even said coolly, raising an eyebrow at his husband.

Smoke began to rise from the stove, accompanied by a terrible charred smell, and Isak swore violently, struggling to get Lilli strapped into her highchair so he could deal with the mess he’d made.

Laughter rang out from his laptop speakers.

“Shut _up_ ,” Isak complained. He snatched the pan off the burner and waved a towel at the smoke while Even continued to laugh.

“I told you they were going to burn!” he reminded Isak, eyes folding up into the lines that Isak liked to press his fingers against when Even wasn’t in a different country.

“Yeah,” Isak said, exasperated, “but obviously I didn’t believe you!”

Even looked appalled. “Why not?”

“You lie all the time!”

“Never to you, baby,” Even said, yawning with a grin.

Isak rolled his eyes, smiling back fondly. “Go get some coffee.” And then, per usual, under his breath, he added, “dick.”

“Don’t be rude.” Even swung out of the bed, curving his spine with a satisfying _pop_ , and Isak purposefully averted his eyes from the small of Even’s back as his skin rose above his boxers - his daughter was right next to him, for Christ’s sake.  

“When’s Jonas getting there?” Even called offscreen. Isak ran his head over Lilli’s head and she pushed back against his hand like a cat or something.

“Uh, Tuesday, I think,” Isak said as he scraped the ruined pancakes off the pan, letting them fall anticlimactically into the trash.

“Really?” Even poked his head back into frame and used the little screen in the corner to line up the buttons on his white shirt.

“Yeah. You have a mirror right behind you, you know,” Isak pointed out. He poured more batter into the pan.

Even raised his left eyebrow, stepping back to admire his handiwork. “That’s not as fun.”

“Your meeting’s at eleven, right?” Isak asked, changing the subject before the conversation turned dirty, as it did more often than he’d admit. He wasn’t subtle. Even didn’t comment on it.

“Yeah, and I think I had a really good idea on the plane, but I was half asleep and ate airport sushi right before, so,” he shrugged, “I’ll see how everyone responds during the meeting.”

Isak nodded. He didn’t ask what the idea was, the same way Even didn’t push him on what he did in the lab. Isak’s understanding of Even’s work was simply based in the fact that Even loved it, and he loved Even. Even had told him once that his lack of understanding about film was what made him such an integral part to the whole process - not only did he support Even unconditionally, but, Even explained, he knew a film was good if it made Isak cry.

So far, Isak had yet to sit through one of Even’s movies with dry eyes.

Lilli babbled and hit her fist on the side of her highchair.

“I know, darling,” Isak murmured without thinking, glancing over his shoulder at Lilli to make sure that she wasn’t, like, dying or anything.

“Was that to me or Lil?” Even asked. 

“I mean, considering I forgot you were even here, it was for my child.”

“Wow. Harsh.”

Even was rifling through his suitcase, halfway dressed and frowning.

Isak sighed. “I packed your meds in with your hair gel shit,” he told Even gently.

“No swearing around _my_ child,” Even retorted, holding up the pill bottle with a soft smile to let Isak know he was still teasing. “Also, you didn’t pack me a toothbrush and I’m hurt.” 

“You’re a grown man, Even. You can buy a toothbrush there.”

“Stop deflecting. You just don’t want to admit you forgot to pack it.”

“Me? I’m the master of packing your suitcases!” Isak said at the same time as Even continued, “I swear to God, if you say you’re the master -”

Isak flipped the pancake and reveled in the smooth golden surface before him. “Look, I can make pancakes too.” 

“Yeah, I don’t know how, though, because we still don’t have milk for the batter,” Even said. Isak froze. “Isak. Please tell me you didn’t make pancakes without milk.”

“I have to leave immediately,” Isak deadpanned, and Even started to laugh again, because Isak truly was hopeless in the kitchen without Even.  

Lilli started to giggle too, in time with her father, and Isak was once again full of that feeling, warm like the stove and bright like the light streaming through the windows, and that was his _husband_ and his _daughter_ and he thought that he’d never quite get over that.

“Okay, I have to go grab breakfast,” Even said to the camera. “Can I talk to Lilli before I go?”

He rolled his eyes, but lifted Lilli from her highchair and bounced her on his hip, holding her closely, because she was leaning away from him with her little hands reaching out to try to touch Even through the screen. 

“Hi, angel,” Even said quietly with his eyes gently lit up. “I love you to the moon and back. Have fun today with your dad and make sure he doesn’t burn the house down, yeah?”

Isak let out an offended scoff. “Is your laptop charging?” he asked. It was a thing they did, often, when Even was traveling and he was in and out of the hotel and Isak was running errands with Lilli, where they just left their laptops up on the off chance that they’d catch each other at the same time.  

He mumbled an affirmation as he grabbed his wallet from the bedside table that Isak couldn’t quite see.

“Love you a thousand times,” Even said. “Buy the damn milk and we’ll talk later.” 

“Why does that sound like a threat?” Isak asked, unable to resist one final jab, and Even gave him a look. “Yes, yes, I love you too,” he added.

Even left with a wink and the door shut behind him. Half the reason they kept the Skype going was because they never really said goodbye to each other, ever, like they were existing in one constant conversation.

“Okay,” Isak said softly to Lilli, who was still staring at the empty room that Even left behind. “We have to buy milk or you pappa is going to divorce me. That’s fun, yeah?”

She was six months old. She didn’t have an answer. 

**MONDAY, 12:35**  

Mona was making the third? fourth? pot of coffee. Her hands drummed against the counter as she waited for the last few drops to fall into the pot and all Isak wanted was to tell his boss to _shut the hell up_ , because he had been working for a solid three hours on this one little cell and he couldn’t figure out why it was reacting so strongly when he applied to solution and - shit. He needed a break. 

Isak made his way into the kitchen and nodded to Mona. He grabbed a single apple from his shelf in the cabinet and sent out a silent wish that it hadn’t fermented or anything, because he didn’t really know how long it’d been there.  

He shot off a single red heart to Even, just because he was thinking about him, and resisted the urge to text Eva or Vilde and ask how Lilli was doing.

That was probably the hardest thing about being away from Lilli and Even. He’d be working on something, his hands busy and his mind preoccupied, but it felt like his goddamn heart was out of his chest, half of it in whatever country Even was in that week and half of it across the city with its hands wrapped around the bars of a wooden crib. It was bad when it was just he and Even, but it had only gotten worse once Lilli came into the picture. He crunched into the apple. So, yeah, it was really fucking sappy, but he didn’t feel like himself until he and Even and Lilli were in the same place.

“Coffee?” Mona asked dully.

Isak debated for a few seconds before he nodded and moved back across the kitchen to get his favorite mug.

**TUESDAY, 18:23**

**Issy K:** Are you almost here 

**(Bro)nas:** open the door

Jonas was on the other side of the door when Isak swung it open, his arms heavy with camera bags and his hair tucked sloppily into a snapback.  

“Hey,” Isak laughed, already feeling more relaxed.

Jonas grinned back at him. “I would hug you, but…” he shrugged as he gestured to the bags.

“Yeah, no, come in,” Isak said. “Drop your, uh, all that shit in the guest room.”

“Guest room? That’s my room, man,” Jonas said in response, scoffing at him, walking past him into the house.

“No! Vilde stayed here the other night,” he argued while Jonas carefully piled his belongings on the bed. He ignored the look that Jonas shot him and instead brought his best friend in for a hug, folding together like they had done so many times over the years, his arm around Jonas’s neck and their heads bent together. Fuck. They saw each other often enough, but he really missed when they were younger and together every day.

“Where’s Lilli?” Jonas asked.

“In the playpen in the kitchen,” Isak replied with a jerk of his head. “I’m making dinner.” 

He couldn’t imagine a parallel universe where he and Jonas weren’t best friends, where he couldn’t read every look Jonas was giving him, the one tossed over his shoulder saying _really? you? making dinner?_ and Isak rolled his eyes back at him.

“I’m heating up Chinese food,” he clarified.

Jonas nodded. “Yeah,” he said as they entered the kitchen, “that’s what I thought.”

He reached down to pick Lilli up, her chubby arms rising up to meet him as she cooed. Jonas had loved Lilli always, even back when she was just a concept, when Isak called him, drunk, and said, “Even wants a kid, man, the fuck do I do?”

Jonas was there when she was born, with bright eyes and smiles and jokes to make Isak stop feeling like the world was imploding around him. Jonas was a huge part of Isak’s life, and, by extension, he became a huge part of Lilli’s as well.

Lilli shoved her fist deep into Jonas’s hair and he yelped, part pain and part laughter. 

“Yeah, she’s into pulling hair right now,” Isak said as he snagged the chicken from the microwave right before the timer went off. “You should see her with Eva,” he added. 

“Oh, I have to call her tomorrow,” Jonas said. He swung Lilli, giggling, into her high chair and sat down at the table in his usual spot.

Isak mumbled a bit to let Jonas know he was listening, tossing rice and forks onto the table because neither of them could eat with chopsticks.

“How’s she doing, though?” Jonas asked, a little more serious. “I mean, you talk to her more than I do now.”

“Uh,” Isak said as he sat next to Lilli and adjusted her shirt, “better, I think. I didn’t want to say anything, but it’s been two fucking years, you know? Like, yeah, it sucked, but it’s kind of time to move on.”

“Yeah, but,” Jonas said thoughtfully, crunching on a piece of broccoli, “it was _Noora_.”

Isak shrugged. “Well, she’s finally doing better. I think some of it’s because Vilde’s back.”

“Oh?” Jonas prompted. His eyebrows slowly rose up into his hairline. The whole group had their theories about Vilde and Eva back in the day, to the point where Isak would have conversations with Magnus and Sana about it, but Isak had dropped it after that whole mess with Vilde at that one party.

“Yeah, they hang out, like, a lot,” he said. He watched Lilli push pieces of cereal around the tray of her high chair with uncoordinated fingers.

“Did Vilde end up taking that job at the school?”

“She does all the organization stuff now,” Isak nodded.

“That’s good,” Jonas said. They ate silently for a bit, passing back and forth different plates without asking, but Jonas saved the last few bites for Isak because he knew that Isak liked when the sauce had time to soak in. “What’s Even working on now?”

Isak knitted his eyebrows together. “Some short film in England. It’s not, like, a big project, but it’s a favor for a friend and he’s really excited about it, so.”

Jonas nodded a couple times, and Isak could tell he was gearing up to ask a question, stepping around his words carefully as he said, “Have you been sleeping?”

“Enough,” Isak said shortly. “Have you?" 

“Enough.”

They grinned at each other over fortune cookies then, and Jonas went into his usual rant about how Chinese food and culture had been monetized by America in the name of capitalism, and Isak didn’t roll his eyes once.  

He really fucking missed Jonas. 

**WEDNESDAY, 08:06**

Mornings were hectic on a good day. On days when Isak slept late, they were downright hellish.

He struggled to throw clothes on Lilli and he was pretty sure that her socks didn’t match but it wasn’t like she was some sort of fashion goddess, so she’d be fine.

Jonas was already up and making coffee. Isak half wondered if Jonas had ever gone to bed - the light from his laptop had glowed bright and harsh from the crack under his door for hours last night. He quirked an eyebrow at Isak as he swung into the kitchen, shirt unbuttoned and Lilli talking nonsense over his shoulder. 

“Can you take her for like a second?” Isak asked. He felt a little bad, but he passed Lilli into Jonas’s arms before he got a chance to answer.

“You good?” Jonas asked bemusedly, bouncing Lilli a little on his knee.

“Late,” Isak managed to gasp out. He poured Lilli’s cereal into a little bowl-cup mutation and lined up his shirt, buttoning it up to his throat before tucking it into his pants as fast as could while still making it look somewhat presentable.  

“Isak, hey,” Jonas said. “I can bring her into school if you need me to.”  

Isak knew he was looking at Jonas like he was his savior, but in that moment, he really was. “You could?” 

“Yeah,” Jonas said before turning to address Lilli directly. “We’ll have a little trip, hm?” 

“Fuck, okay, let me grab the rest of her stuff.” Isak headed down the hallway back to Lilli’s nursery, still combing his fingers through unruly hair. “You know where it is and everything? Like, how to get there?”

He came back into the kitchen with a pair of shoes in his hands and Jonas was looking at him completely unfazed. “Yeah,” he said, “I visit Eva there whenever I’m in town.”

“Okay,” Isak breathed. “Can you just text me when you drop her off, then?”

“We’ll be fine,” Jonas said. Lilli was brushing her hands against his ear and Jonas shifted her to rest against his side.

Isak stood helplessly. “Okay,” he said again, “okay, I’m gonna go then. Don’t forget her breakfast and just… yeah.”

“So then go!” Jonas said, raising his eyebrows. Isak felt like he was abandoning Lilli, but also, he really had to fucking leave if he wanted to make it on time.

He stepped over to the table, kissed her once on the head, and nodded gratefully to Jonas before he was out the door and in the car.

Isak dialed Even’s number before he was even all the way out of the driveway, sandwiching the phone between his shoulder and his ear. It rang three times before Even picked up. 

“Hey, baby,” he said, and Isak breathed a little easier. 

“Hey, I’m lowkey freaking out.”

He felt Even’s mood shift through the phone, knew he was furrowing his eyebrows and leaning forward like he could reach Isak through the phone as he asked, “Are you okay? What’s wrong?”

“No, nothing, it’s just,” he paused, “I was late for work so Jonas is taking Lilli into school.” It sounded kind of silly when he says it out loud, but he and Even had built the kind of relationship where Isak could go to him with (almost) all of his worries, and the other way around, and Even wouldn’t always understand, but he’d always listen.

“You think she’ll be okay?” Even said.

“She’ll be fine,” Isak answered immediately. “It’s like, weird, you know? Because it’s out of the routine, I guess.”

“But you trust Jonas,” Even reminded him.

“I do. Fuck, yeah, of course I do.”

“Then it’s chill.”

“Then it’s chill.” Isak was sitting in his parking spot by that point, staring up at the building.

“Are you lurking in the parking lot again?” Even said accusingly.

“No!” Isak said, acting shocked, coughing once. Fuck, the cough was his tell and Even knew it. “Or, maybe. Yes,” he said.

“You don’t have to work if you don’t want to, you know,” Even said quietly.

It was a conversation they’d had a hundred times before, and it almost always turned into an argument. Isak took the job at the research lab as soon as he got out of school, because one of them had to think about the future and Even was still devouring films and scribbling ideas into half-full notebooks, and when Even’s career took off, Isak was just…stuck. He loved his job, he swore, but half the time he couldn’t even work on the things he actually _wanted_ to.

“Ev,” he sighed, pulling himself out of the car with a considerable amount of effort. “I want to work, yeah? Just, like, working _for_ someone sucks.” 

Even made a noise of agreement that was cut off halfway through when Isak slammed the door shut. “Let me make a few more films and I’ll buy you whatever kind of lab you want,” he promised with a laugh still breaking through, and Isak rolled his eyes.

“That’s literally not how it works,” he said, smiling despite himself, “but you do that.” 

“I will,” Even said. It sounded more serious, though, and Isak did _not_ want to get into that whole thing, so he stepped inside the building and told Even he had to go.

“Love you even if you’re an underling at work,” Even teased. And once again Isak tried not to smile, but he did anyways, because that was the effect that Even always had on him.

“Love you even if your next films are total failures and you have to go back to working in that cafe,” he fired back. 

“Shut the fuck up, you loved seeing me in that apron.” 

Isak coughed again. “Bye, Even.”

“Love you!”

He hung up and stared down at his phone for a second before realizing that he hadn’t gotten a text from Jonas yet, and he and Lilli definitely should have been at the school by now. God, he thought, he needed to get a handle on it, get working and get distracted. Jonas had Lilli and he trusted Jonas.

Keeping busy worked for a grand total of four minutes, or until the text came in and he felt like he could breathe again. 

**(Bro)nas:** Attachment: 1 Image

She’s been in Eva’s classroom for like a second and she’s already got paint on her shirt

It was Eva holding Lilli, smiling down at her, Lilli looking wonderingly at whoever was behind the camera, presumably Jonas, and Isak’s heart beat slow and warm in his chest.

**THURSDAY, 15:50**

**Even:** How do I get coffee stains out of a white shirt? 

**Isak:**???

**Even:** Help

**Isak:** Do laundry?

Spray it beforehand and then use bleach in the wash

**Even:** Baby. Have I told you how much I love you.

**Isak:** Yes actually

**Even:** <3

How’s work?

**Isak:** Please don’t ask me that

**Even:** Yikes, that bad?

**Isak:** I’m gonna rant

**Even:** Hell yes! 

**Isak:** Mona’s stopping my entire fucking project because of money issues or some shit and they’re “redirecting resources to more prominent causes” which is complete bullshit but I can’t ask her for more info because she probably doesn’t even fucking know because it all comes from ABOVE which is so cryptic and I don’t even know what it means and ughhhhhhhh

So

I just feel like anytime I start actually getting interested in something it gets fucking shut down or something and I’m so fucking tired of it

**Even:** Can they even do that? Wouldn’t it be more logical to see out the whole project if they’ve already invested money in your research?

That’s so shitty baby I’m sorry

You deserve better 

**Isak:** Yeah

Anyways how’s work with you?

**Even:** I hate to say it but better than yours :( 

**Isak:** Making progress?

**Even:** Yeah the whole thing is kind of just falling into place and I’m really liking the outcome

**Isak:** Okay but will it make me cry though

**Even:** Always 

**FRIDAY, 23:17**

Isak was curled up on the couch on his side, head on the armrest and back pressed against the cushions, wearing Even’s sweatshirt and watching some shitty American comedy. The laugh track kept waking him up. It was grating, worming its way deep into his mind, and he was just lazy enough and just stubborn enough that he didn’t change the channel.

The creaking of the front door was what caused him to wake up enough that he could lift his head and spin around. Jonas was shooting a gig and then shooting the band afterwards, so he wouldn’t be back until it became light outside, if at all, and he was the only person who had a key, besides, of course -

“Even?” Isak asked incredulously. And he was there, leaning one hand against the wall to kick off his shoes, grinning sloppily with his hair hanging over his eyebrows while Isak watched confused on the couch.

“Hey, baby,” Even said. Nonchalant. He strolled over and buried his hand in Isak’s hair, kissed him on the crown of his head and flopped down beside him on the couch, like this was _normal_ , like he wasn’t supposed to be nowhere _near_ Norway in this exact minute. Even sighed comfortably into the cushions. “What are you watching?” he asked, resting his forearm on the curve of Isak’s hip.  

Isak narrowed his eyes. “Explain,” he demanded.  

“I’m home for the weekend.”

That explained absolutely nothing, and Isak jutted his chin out in response, glaring at Even from underneath what he knew was a mess of curls ever since Even had fucked with it a second ago. 

Even caught Isak’s gaze and smiled sweetly at him. “You were stressed and sad and lonely and you needed me.”

“I don’t _need_ you,” Isak said, scrunching up his nose and pushing his feet against Even’s thigh. How was it that they’d been together so long, and yet Even still kept surprising him? 

“Okay,” Even agreed. He pulled his body overtop of Isak’s and hovered above him, Isak rolling over on his back to face him, their lips not quite touching.  

For the first time, the laugh track of the show faded into the silence around them.  

Even’s breath was warm and familiar and smelled of that lavender tea he liked to buy when Isak wasn’t there to nag him about how expensive it was, and the feeling of that breath sent shivers down Isak’s spine when it parted his lips as Even whispered, “You don’t need me, but you want me.”

God. If Even hadn’t slid his leg between both of Isak’s, then Isak most definitely would have rolled his eyes at that line. But it just so happened that Lilli was dead asleep and Jonas was at some underground club and Even was here, not in England, but _here_ on the little couch that was too small for the both of them to lay like this, and so Isak didn’t roll his eyes. He closed them instead.


	3. "I don't think ants lay eggs."

**SATURDAY, 09:14**

“Wake the fuck up.”

Isak groaned and rolled over, smushing his face into the - wait, fuck, that wasn’t a pillow. He cracked an eye open. He was lying on their living room floor, bundled up in the duvet Even had dragged out last night, and Jonas’s familiar face was looking down at him disapprovingly.

“Lilli,” Isak mumbled, scrambling to get up.

“Yeah, chill, Even’s got her,” Jonas said. He stood up from his position crouching next to Isak and stretched. “You know that you guys have, like, a queen sized bed in the next room over, right?”

Jonas kind of had a point. But also, at the same time, Jonas could fuck all the way off because he didn’t have a six month old baby that was just starting to sleep through the night or a fucking ridiculous husband that just flew in from another country as a surprise. 

“Ouch.” He’d slept weird on his neck, probably because of the whole floor situation, and he was sore from, well. Other things.

“I picked up bagels on my way in this morning,” Jonas called from the kitchen. Isak ripped himself up from the little nest on the floor and winced, leaning against the doorframe and watching Jonas with his own look of judgement.

Isak looked at his best friend, still dressed in the clothes he left in, camera on the counter. “Did you just get here?” he asked.

“Like ten minutes ago. But yeah.”

“Jonas,” Isak said, warningly. “Did you sleep at all last night?”

“First of all,” Jonas said, slow, spreading cream cheese on Isak’s favorite type of bagel. “You have no room to criticize me, because you, like, never sleep. And no, so I’m running on coffee and adrenaline.”

Isak sighed and flopped down at the table. Jonas slid the bagel over to him on a plate and he took it begrudgingly. “Fine. How’d it go, then? Good shoot?”

“Yeah. The guys in the band were really chill, which made for some cool shots, so I’ll probably work with those today,” Jonas said. He frowned and reached for his camera.

It may have been the fact that they’d been living together for so long, or, if Isak was feeling sappy, the whole connection between them, but he knew Even was in the doorway before he made a single sound.

“You’re in trouble,” Isak said without turning around.

Even walked over and bent down to press a kiss to his cheek, one hand supporting Lilli’s head, and Isak hummed around the bite of bagel he’d just taken.

“Why’s that?” Even asked.

“Because I woke up alone! And because my neck hurts from sleeping on the floor, and also because ‘oh, I’m home for the weekend’ isn’t a logical explanation for why you’re here,” Isak said, scoffing at Even.

Even strapped Lilli into her high chair and sighed. “You woke up alone because I had to take care of our child. Your neck hurts because you refused to go to bed unless I carried you, which I didn’t want to do, so we slept on the floor. Stop being a brat and finish your breakfast.”

“Oh, damn,” Jonas said from across the table, laughing at Isak, who took another bite of his bagel and stewed.

“Okay,” he said, petulantly, “but you still didn’t give me anything on why you’re here.”

Even sat next to Jonas. With the two of them on one side of the table, Isak felt very outnumbered, and he crossed his arms over his chest. 

“Most of the film is set in place,” Even explained calmly. “I’ll probably have to take a few calls and emails, but they don’t really need me right now, so I’m just going to fly back out on Sunday night. Happy?”

Isak was, actually, very fucking happy, but he wasn’t about to let Even and Jonas know that. “Fine.”

“Okay, then,” Even said, standing up and moving to go get Lilli’s breakfast out of the refrigerator. “Jonas,” he asked over his shoulder, “how long are you staying?”

“Not sure.” Jonas peered into his coffee cup. “I’ve got a shoot next week, so I’ll leave before then, but something might come up between now and that, so it’s whatever.” He tilted his head back and drained the rest of the coffee, down to the last few drops in there.

“Anything good?” Even prompted, handing Isak the food so that he could start feeding Lilli. Isak was grateful for the chance to distance himself from the conversation, because sometimes, when Even and Jonas started talking photography, he got completely lost and ended up just nodding along to whatever they were saying about aperture. So, instead, he just made sure Lilli ate Cheerios, watched her hands grab at them as they skittered across the table of her high chair, until Even snapped his fingers in front of Isak’s face.

“Hm?”

“My mom wants to know if we can bring Lilli by for a visit before I leave again,” Even said, looking at Isak a little amused and a little exasperated.

“Oh, yeah. Of course. Tomorrow?” Isak asked. He knew that Even would grin big and nod, and that’s exactly what he did.

“Tomorrow,” he said, like it was a promise of great things. “You joining?” Even asked as he turned to Jonas, who was still staring at the display of the previews on his camera. “I don’t think you’ve seen my mom since the wedding.”

“Nah, I think I’m busy all day.” Jonas shook out his curls. “Thanks for the offer, though.”

“All good. When’s your date?” Even asked conversationally, and  _ that _ got Isak’s attention, because Jonas was his best friend, and Even hadn’t even been home, so why did he know about a date that Isak didn’t?

“Date?” Isak narrowed his eyebrows at Jonas.

Jonas nodded smugly. “Yeah, I have a date, thank you very much.”

Isak looked over at Even for backup, but of course he was no help, instead folding his arms and looking at the table like the wood grain was  _ so fascinating  _ even though they all knew that the table wasn’t even real wood. “With… Eva?”

“Nope,” Jonas said, popping his lips. “Guess again.”

“Okay, it could literally be anyone, though,” Isak shot back at Jonas, along with an eye roll. “At least give me a hint.”

Stretching back in the chair nonchalantly, Jonas yawned. “It’s someone you know. Someone we went to Nissen with.”

Isak glared at the two men across the table. They were both enjoying this way too much, Jonas looking at him innocently and Even avoiding eye contact completely. Isak hated not knowing things, hated being left out of the loop, and the both of them knew it.

“Even,” Isak said sweetly, focusing all his attention on his husband, “will you please tell me about Jonas’s date?”

“Why would I do that?” Even asked back, just as sweetly, fighting a smile as Jonas whispered, “Don’t give in to him, man.”

“Because Jonas is being a little bitch and I want to know,” Isak answered immediately. He spoke loud enough to drown out the sound of Jonas’s repeated whispers. 

Even shook his head. “Not a good enough reason.”

“Fine,” Isak said, calculating the weight of his words precisely, narrowing his eyes and considering it for a second before playing his final card. “Tell me and I’ll do the thing tonight.”

“Julian Dahl. It’s Julian Dahl. He’s going out to dinner with Julian Dahl,” Even said as fast as he possibly could, eyes wide. 

Isak smirked at Jonas.

“We could have dragged that out for so much longer, though, what the fuck, Even?” Jonas groaned.

“Sorry.”

Even didn’t sound very sorry.

**SUNDAY, 13:52**

Isak hovered over Even’s shoulder as he buckled Lilli into the carseat.

“It goes across -”

“Yeah, Isak, I know how to buckle her in.”

“I know you know,” Isak said, stepping back from the car with his hands raised in surrender. “I was just supervising.”

Even shut the car door and shot Isak a look, one of the  _ I know that’s bullshit but whatever you say, baby,  _ ones. Isak huffed in response and stalked back over to his side of the car, pulling open the door as dramatically as possible and settling into the passenger seat. 

“Are we still doing that thing where we have to play jazz music for her to make her brain waves better or whatever?” Even asked, glaring at the aux cord like it personally offended him. “Because jazz music makes me feel like ants are laying eggs in my brain.”

Isak flipped over to the radio as an answer. “I don’t think ants lay eggs,” he said. He hit the buttons of their preset stations until he found a good one, old hip-hop, the kind they almost always listened to together. “And Biggie will probably help her brain waves.”

“Sure, sure.” Even bobbed his head a bit as he pulled out of their driveway and started heading down the street in the direction of his mom’s house. “Ants definitely lay eggs, though.”

“No? They have that whole tunnel system thing.”

“How they live has no correlation to how they reproduce,” Even pointed out, scanning the road carefully and then turning to the right. He was a much better driver when Lilli was in the car. Isak could remember the days when Even had taught him how to drive, how Even drove with one hand in a bag of french fries and the other on Isak’s upper thigh and his knee pressed against the wheel for steering. That had been a truly harrowing experience.

“Okay, that’s not true, because environment has a huge impact on adaptations, meaning that how they live and the environment in which they live can change stuff like how they reproduce,” Isak said. Even was an art hoe, honestly. He didn’t stand a chance.

“Whatever. They lay eggs,” Even insisted, looking over at Isak and letting his smile spread from his lips to his cheeks to his eyes. “Like spiders.”

“Fuck you, I’m Googling it.” 

Oh, fuck, Isak realized. The art hoe was right.

“So?” Even asked eagerly. He knew full well that Isak’s silence meant he didn’t want to admit that he was wrong.

“You might,” Isak sighed, “be kind of right in that, uh, the queen ant can reproduce without, uh,  _ not  _ laying eggs.”

“All I got from that is that I’m right.”

Isak stayed quiet and leaned against the seat. 

“I’m right, aren’t I?” Even asked teasingly, laughter just sitting on the edge of his voice. “Come on, you can tell me. I’m right. Just say it.”

“No,” Isak huffed, turning away to look out the window so that Even couldn’t see the smile on his lips. 

Literally the only bad thing about being married and together for this long was that Even knew he was smiling anyways, and poked him in the stomach so that Isak squirmed in the seat and tried to shoot Even a deathly glare while laughing, which, obviously, didn’t work too well. Even just smiled and went back to rapping along with the radio until they reached his mom’s place. 

Isak let Even unbuckle Lilli and tried to pretend that he wasn’t double checking everything Even did, but he was totally hovering and Even shot him an indulgent look. Even swung Lilli up and she giggled brightly. 

“Ready to go see your grandma?” Even asked the baby that he held close to his chest, brushing her cheek with his thumb and Isak couldn’t help but smile, watching the two of them and he’d never really be over it, he thought. Ever.

But Even took Isak’s hand with the arm that wasn’t holding Lilli and linked their fingers together, leading him up to the door and keeping a hold of his hand while Isak knocked, three times.

Even’s mom opened the door happily and gazed upon the little family in front of her.

“Isak, baby,” she said, opening both arms and pulling him into a hug. He tucked his nose into her neck and breathed in her smell, a mix of bread and Chanel and acrylic paint, and he honestly loved Even’s mom. “Even.” She pulled her arms off of Isak and moved to kiss Even’s cheek, quickly. Ana then plucked Lilli right from the crook of Even’s arm and brought her up so she could look at her. 

“My, God,” she said in wonder, “you’ve grown so much.”

Even laughed lightly. “You saw her like a month ago, Mamma.”

“That’s too long,” Ana argued. She pressed a kiss to Lilli’s head and stepped back so that Isak and Even could walk in and kick their shoes off in the hallway. It was familiar, brought Isak back to the first time he came home with Even and all the times he’d been here over the years, Christmas dinners and Sunday mornings and sometimes he felt like his mother-in-law was giving him everything he’d missed from his own childhood, and he didn’t know how much Even told her about his parents but it still felt like she  _ knew _ . There was a warm pie on the kitchen counter and a covered canvas against the window.

Even immediately started to rifle through the refrigerator for a snack, like he was nineteen again and Isak always found it funny how Even seemed younger when he was around his mom.

The conversation flowed as easily as it always did between Even and his mom. Isak watched it -- the way they moved around each other, how Even took Lilli back from his mother in the middle of a sentence, how their laughs were so similar that they lit up the room together. 

“Isak, how’s work?” Ana asked when Even left the room to change Lilli’s diaper with the giant ass bag they kept in the car. 

He smiled at her. Ana could always make him smile. “Could be better,” he answered, and gratefully took the cup of tea that she offered him. 

“You do okay when Even’s gone? Because you know that I’m here for whatever you need, whenever you need it,” she said. Ana looked at him like she could see how tired he was.

“Oh, you just want to see Lilli more,” he teased gently, and she laughed. “But, no, seriously, I’m okay. Eva helps a lot, and Jonas is actually staying with us this week.”

“I  _ love  _ Jonas,” Ana said, eyes lighting up. She hadn’t seen him since the wedding, but she’d cried during Jonas’s speech and Isak didn’t think she’d ever forgotten how lovingly Jonas spoke of both Isak and Even.

Even reentered the room then, Lilli babbling and pushing her hands into his neck, and that’s how they stayed on that Sunday afternoon: passing Lilli back and forth between the three of them, eating sweets and looking at Ana’s recent works, laughing and soaking up the sun that slotted golden through the windows.

**MONDAY, 07:48**

Even was acting annoyed, but Isak knew that he loved shit like this. 

“You  _ cannot  _ skip work just to take me to the airport,” Even said. He crossed his arms over his chest. 

Isak mirrored his position and crossed his own arms. “And you  _ cannot  _ tell me what to do,” he mimicked. He narrowed his eyes at Even. “Plus, I already called it in and Jonas took Lilli, so…”

Sighing dramatically, Even gave in like he always did, and Isak couldn’t help but smile. “Fine,” he said, “but then I’m taking you out for breakfast.”

That morning proved Isak’s theory that Even drove better when Lilli was in the car. With just Isak in the passenger seat, Even whipped around like he didn’t have a care in the world, all bony knuckles and shimmering teeth, singing shitty pop songs to Isak. 

“Why are you so fucking  _ awake _ ?” Isak groaned. He let his head fall back on the seat and Even grabbed his hand, tapping his fingertips on the insides of Isak’s wrist.

He didn’t answer, just pulled into a parking spot outside of a little cafe that Isak didn’t even know  _ existed _ , and he was trying to crane his neck to see the sign when he suddenly became entirely distracted by Even stepping out of the car and stretching, his shirt just barely rising up to expose his pale hip bones, which were, conveniently, exactly at Isak’s eye level.

Isak was still trying to catch his breath when Even doubled over to peek back into the car. “You getting out?” he asked charmingly. Fuck him. He knew exactly what he was doing.

“Uh, yeah,” he said, scrambling out of the car and slamming the door behind him. Even caught his eye over the roof of the car and held it, smiled softly, and then turned to go into the cafe.

Even ordered two fucking brownies for breakfast and Isak would not shut up about it.

“You’re going to get diabetes and die and leave me and Lilli alone to grieve,” he said. He waved his fork in the direction of Even’s breakfast. 

Even shoved the entire rest of the brownie in his mouth in retaliation, chewing slowly, crumbs on his lips. “Isak,” he said when he finished, “my love, my husband. Man of my life.”

“What, Even.”

“Look at yourself,” he sniffed. Isak leaned his elbows on the table and glared, because he could tell that Even was gearing up for another overdramatic speech. “You are a sad, sad man because you’re eating fruit for breakfast. I, on the other hand, do not talk about death over a nice meal, because I am happy. And I’m happy because I don’t restrict myself to eating  _ healthy _ shit. So, yes, you might outlive me, but really, when you think about it, the point is quality over quantity. And my quality of life is a thousand times better when I eat this amazing brownie that  _ you _ will never be able to experience.”

Even seemed a little too satisfied with himself, taking another bite smugly. Isak just looked at him blankly and said, deadpan, “Fine. I’ll just remarry when you die.” 

“Holy fuck,” Even choked, throwing up a hand to cover his mouth so that he didn’t spew chocolate all over Isak as he laughed. “You’re being so  _ mean _ .”

When he took his hand away, Even’s grin was wide enough that Isak could see the chocolate frosting on the side of his canine. Isak couldn’t help but smile back at him.

Even pushed the remainder of his brownie across the table to Isak, nudging with his pointer finger and giving Isak his  _ please do this  _ eyes as he said, “Just try a bite. Just a little bite. You’ll feel so much better, I promise.”

Isak glared at the brownie. It looked  _ so fucking good _ , even though it was like eight in the morning. He frowned, glanced up at Even’s bright eyes, and then gave in. He always gave in to Even.

“Isn’t it amazing?” Even encouraged. 

He closed his eyes in delight and let the taste spread across his tongue. “Fuck you,” he mumbled.

Even quirked his head the side. “Sorry, what was that? Were you thanking me?”

“You heard me,” Isak said, wiping at the corner of his lips and passing the brownie back towards Even. “Christ, that’s so good.”

That seemed to satisfy Even, who’d been leaning forward like he was waiting for Isak’s judgement on the brownie, and he could finally relax once Isak gave it. Isak took another sip of his coffee to wash down the brownie.

“We have to go soon, babe,” Even said quietly, tapping two fingers on Isak’s hand.

Isak held still to study Even -- he knew, logically, that Even was only going to be gone for two weeks, and he’d been without Even for far longer than that before, but it still hurt. Saying goodbye to Even always hurt.

**MONDAY, 10:37**

Isak had never liked airports. They always felt a little too dirty, a little too busy, a little too much like a surreal space and it fucked him up. But he walked Even as far as he could, until there were employees checking tickets and Even had his in his right hand, folded up into his passport.

The two of them stood in the airport while people flowed around them. 

“You know I love you, right?” Even said with his fingertips pressing into the back of Isak’s neck, shaking him gently. 

Isak smiled at him, soft with his lips closed and his eyes drifting shut, and answered, “Yeah, Ev. I know.” And this was one of those times where he might tease Even for being so dramatic, or for constantly reminding Isak of how much he loved him, or for packing way too much for two weeks in a hotel, but he didn’t. Instead he just stayed still with his arms looped around Even’s neck, looking at him.

“I really need to go,” Even finally murmured apologetically, but he  _ couldn’t  _ go, because Isak hadn’t even kissed his fucking husband yet, and so he pulled Even impossibly closer and pressed their lips together until Even dropped his passport on the ground so that he could run his fingers through Isak’s hair. Isak pressed his hands against Even’s cheeks like that would keep him here in Oslo, keep him here with Isak. It didn’t work. Even pulled away.

He laughed lightly against Isak’s lips. “I’ll be home before you know it,” he assured him. Even bent to pick up his passport and his luggage from the ground.

Isak watched him as he stood up and smiled, eyes not leaving Isak’s for a second.

“Even,” Isak said, voice small but strong, so that only Even could hear it. “I love you too.”

At that, Even kissed him one last time. “I’ll call you when I land,” he promised. 

He walked backwards, eyes still on Isak, somehow avoiding bumping into all the people in the bustling airport as he did so, and Isak never knew how he could  _ do  _ that, but Isak blinked and Even was gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okey dokey so just a little note on this fic in particular: i've seen a couple of you refer to it as your happy place or whatever and i just wanted to say that this is definitely my happy place!!!! 
> 
> however, that means that i have no plans for this, no schedule for publishing, it's unbetaed, and i love every single scene in it! i dont stress over it and i keep it as light as possible <33333
> 
> so updates are pretty inconsistent while i write my new Thing (tm) 
> 
> but i love love love u all and thank u


	4. "You're my savior."

**TUESDAY, 7:30**

Jonas was sleeping, finally, and so was Lilli, and Isak was at the kitchen table drinking coffee. The late morning yesterday had let him feel some sense of freedom, like a little miniature vacation, and he couldn’t help but think that there was something to not working. He just -- fuck, when he thought about it, he wanted nothing more than to be at home with Lilli every single day. And it kind of sucked that his income went to, like, buying some nice clothes for himself while Even was the one actually providing for their family. But then again, he didn’t want to fall into heteropatriarchal roles, did he? Fuck. He finished his coffee. What he really needed to do was talk to Eskild.

**Baby Gay:** Hi, are you free for dinner at some point this week?

**Eskild Roommate:** will my lovely son-in-law be there

**Baby Gay:** He’s traveling

**Eskild Roommate:** how about my beautiful granddaughter

**Baby Gay:** Not your granddaughter but yes

**Eskild Roommate:** see you thursday at 19 <3

He let out a breath and Jonas stumbled into the kitchen.

“Show in Trondheim,” he said, reaching for a mug. “So I’ll be heading out tonight.”

Isak blinked. “Oh.” His heart sank just the slightest, thinking about how empty the house would feel and how loudly Lilli’s cries would echo. “Will you be here for dinner?”

Jonas shrugged. 

“Let me know, yeah?” Isak said, standing and stretching. Jonas grunted his agreement and Isak went to go get Lilli up. She’d been sleeping later and later every morning and it was honestly a relief.

“Hi, angel,” he said as he stepped towards her crib. “How are you feeling?”

She shifted when she heard his voice and his heart swelled.

And then she coughed.

Fuck.

He pressed the back of his hand to her forehead and her skin was burning, on fire, and he felt a fear that he had never felt before. Fuck.

“Jonas,” he called, rushing out of the room, “she’s sick.”

Jonas looked up nonchalantly. “Yeah, man,” he said, “she has been.”

“No, like, she’s  _ sick  _ sick.”

“Shit,” Jonas said, and the mug landed heavy on the counter as they both rushed to Lilli’s crib.

The two of the stood over her, watching her fuss and sniffle, and Jonas touched her arm and furrowed his brows.

“Bro, you have to take her to the doctor,” Jonas said as he shook his head.

“I know,” Isak said, running a hand through his hair, “I know. Fuck. I’m going to call Ev.”

Even’s phone rang. And rang. And rang and rang, and then there was a sleepy voice on the other end, saying “Isak?” and coated with concern.

“Hi, Lilli’s really sick,” Isak said, all rushed. “Like, I need to take her into the doctor.”

“Okay,” Even said, “it’s okay. She’s going to be okay. Is Jonas there?”

“Yeah.”

“Good, okay, so you’re not alone. When does the doctor’s office open?”

“Nine,” Isak answered. The direct questions were helping, forcing him to focus, forcing him to ignore all the what-ifs running through his head.

“Call into work,” Even said. He sounded more awake and he sounded sure and Isak was incredibly grateful. “Talk it through with Jonas and be there when the doctor opens.”

“And make sure Vilde knows Lilli’s sick,” Isak added.

“Yeah. Yeah, good point.” Even was silent for a second. “Isak?”

“Mm?”

“We’re going to be okay.”

And Isak breathed, in and out, and said, “We will.”

“I love you,” Even whispered. “Take care of yourself and take care of our kid.”

Isak smiled. “I love you and I will.”

“Okay,” Even said. “I’m going to go now, but keep me updated, yeah?”

“Yeah. Bye, husband.”

“Bye, husband.”

And then the call was over.

“All good?” Jonas asked, peering out of the door of Lilli’s room.

Isak nodded, already dialing Vilde’s phone.

“Vilde?”

“Hi, Isak,” she said brightly.

He steeled himself. “Hi, sorry for calling before you get to work, but Lilli’s really sick and we just thought you guys should know.”

Vilde clicked her tongue sadly, which, like, Isak didn’t even know was possible, but she did it. “Such a shame! I hope she feels better. And thanks for letting us know.”

“Thanks, Vilde.”

“No problem! Talk to you later,” she said.

“Bye,” he added, almost an afterthought, as he hung up.

Okay. It would be okay. He stretched his neck. Call into work and then get ready to go to the doctor. Mona would kill him, but, you know, he’d be home with Lilli and that was what mattered.

**TUESDAY, 8:58**

Isak tried his best to soothe Lilli as he carried her from the car to the front door of the doctor’s office.

Calling his boss had gone about as well as he had expected, her voice sighing on the other end of the phone as she said, “Yeah, Isak, it’s fine. Do what you can from home.”

He stood by the door while the receptionist opened it.

“Hi,” she said with a smile, walking to the computer. “Child’s name?”

“Lilli Bech Næsheim,” he rattled off, supporting Lilli’s neck and shushing as he bounced her a little.

“And what seems to be the problem?”

“She’s, uh, had this cold that won’t go away,” he explained. “And this morning she woke up and it felt like she had a really high fever and, yeah, I got really worried, so I’m here.”

“It’s okay,” the receptionist said soothingly. “Better safe than sorry. We’ll take care of her.”

“Okay,” Isak said, feeling some measure of relief. It was going to be okay.

**TUESDAY, 9:35**

“She has the flu,” Isak informed Even as soon as he answered his phone.

Even sighed in relief. “Oh, good.”

“Ev, people  _ die  _ from the flu.”

“Yeah, in the 1800s.”

“She’s a  _ baby _ .”

“You’re a baby,” Even shot back affectionately. “Stop overreacting; it’s nothing awful and she’s fine.”

Isak groaned. Pinching his phone between his shoulder and his ear, he strapped Lilli into her carseat.

“Hey,” he said, “so I’ve been thinking.”

Even murmured to let Isak know he was listening.

“I think I want to stay at home for a little while. Like, a couple years.” And he held his breath, waiting for Even to answer, having no idea what to expect. He wasn’t even sure that he was sure.

“Isak,” Even said slowly, “you need to do what’s right for you. If you’re not happy working, then be at home. And then if you’re not happy at home, then work. We’ll figure it out no matter what and I’ll support you no matter what.”

Isak exhaled a breath that he didn’t even know he was holding.

They were going to be okay.

**TUESDAY, 20:14**

“Please, just eat something,” Isak pleaded his daughter, holding a spoon near her mouth. She cried and squirmed and coughed and she looked so sick and his heart was breaking because he knew that she didn’t understand why she was feeling like this and why he couldn’t help her.

And Jonas was gone, and Even was gone, and Lilli was screaming now, and Isak cried. He cried, and he cried, and he held his daughter, and he wished more than anything that he had a mom that he could call and ask for help.

His heart hurt and he felt more alone than he had in years.

His phone rang. He scrambled for it, searching for some release from his thoughts, and answered it without checking who it was. 

“Isak, baby,” Ana said, and Isak was overcome with relief.

“Hi,” he breathed. 

“I was just calling to check on you and Lilli. Even said that she has strep?”

“No, she has the flu,” Isak explained.

“Oh, that’s rough,” Ana said sympathetically. “Are you doing okay?”

“I am currently sitting on the floor crying because Lilli won’t eat,” Isak admitted.

Ana was quiet for a second. “Do you want me to come over tomorrow?” she asked, low and loving.

“I can stay home,” Isak said, “but I have to get some work done.”

“That doesn’t answer my question.”

Isak sighed, thinking it through, and then gave his answer like a confession. “Yes, please.”

“See you at ten.” 

He could hear the smile in Ana’s voice. 

**WEDNESDAY, 10:05**

Ana swept into the house with an arm full of grocery bags. 

“You’re my savior,” Isak said, closing the door behind her, and she winked at him.

She placed the bags on the counter and turned to look at Isak.

“How’d you sleep?” she asked, eyeing him like she already knew the answer.

He shrugged. “Not too well. I ended up spending the night on Lilli’s floor.”

“Isak,” Ana reprimanded. 

“I had to make sure she was okay!” He was defensive but half joking, throwing up his hands to play up the drama of it all.

“You also,” Ana said, unpacking the bags and laying the food out on the counter, “need to make sure that  _ you’re  _ okay.” She looked at him pointedly.

He smiled tiredly. “Thank you, Ana.”

And it had been years since he’d met Ana, but she’d never made him feel anything but loved. Even got his deep capacity for love from his mother and it showed in the way that Ana gave without limits, the way she opened her arms and her home to Isak without question, the way she loved her son and her son’s husband and her granddaughter. And for Isak, who grew up with a mother who was never really there, Ana changed everything.

“I’ll put the groceries away if you want to go say hi to Lilli,” Isak said, gesturing to the spread on the counter.

Ana grinned. “I would love to.”

“She’s a little stuffy and she just woke up, so she probably won’t be in a good mood,” Isak warned, but Ana shrugged him off and walked down the hallway to Lilli’s bedroom.

Isak began to sort the groceries and put away the refrigerated food. Ana had brought staples, milk and bread and the like, along with some little treats like those tiny oranges that Isak loved and some sour candies.

He could hear Ana talking to Lilli in the other room, voice low enough that he couldn’t quite make out what she was saying, just the timbre and rise and fall of her words. 

As he was putting away the last few groceries, Ana came back in with Lilli on her hip.

“Go take a nap,” she said, nodding back to Isak and Even’s bedroom. “I’ve got her for a few hours.”

Isak shook his head. “As nice as that sounds, I actually have to get work done today. Is it okay if I go work in our room while you guys hang out?”

Ana ran her hand over Lilli’s hair and grinned at her granddaughter. “That sounds great.”

“Okay,” Isak said, more to himself than anyone else. 

He grabbed his phone and headed back to the bedroom where his laptop was waiting, and he curled up in the chair by the window with it on his lap. He pulled up his emails and checked the list that Mona sent him and he sighed.

Actually, while he was thinking about it, he should draft his notice. 

He switched over to a new tab and googled  _ how to write a resignation _ , skimmed through a few articles, and then opened a blank email.

_ Hi Mona, _

_ I will be resigning from my position two weeks from now in order to stay at home with my daughter. I can help train a new technician and am willing to help in any other way that you need prior to my leaving. ajkdsflaf what else do i wriiiiiiiiiiiite _

_ Thanks! _

_ Isak Valtersen _

He stretched, hit send, and closed out of his email.

Oh, shit.

He hit  _ send _ .

Instead of save, he hit fucking send.

Fuck.

He called Even before he even knew what he was doing.

“Hi, baby,” Even said in surprise.

“I was just drafting my resignation email and I accidentally sent it and I’m so fucking dumb.” It all tumbled out like one word and he heard Even shushing him.

“Calm down,” Even said. “Slower. What did you send?”

“I sent my resignation when it wasn’t done.”

“Okay, well you can’t undo it now, so what can you do to help the situation?”

Isak screwed his eyes shut and exhaled through his mouth. “Send another email explaining what happened and apologising?”

“Good,” Even answered. “Read it out to me as you type it.”

Isak pulled up a new email. “ _ Mona _ ,” he dictated, “ _ Sorry for prematurely sending that email! Just wanted to put in my two weeks notice.  _ Is that good?”

“Short and sweet,” Even said with a grin in his voice. 

“Smiley?”

“No, Isak!”

**THURSDAY, 18:49**

Eskild breezed into the house like a breath of fresh air. 

“Jesus, this place is a mess,” he said, wrinkling his nose at the living room, where Isak had been working recently, covered in papers and empty coffee mugs and blankets. 

Isak shrugged. Eskild was well acquainted with his mess by this point in their relationship. “I’ve been working from home this week,” he explained.

“How’s that going?”

Isak shrugged. It hadn’t been going badly, per se, but he’d been spending a lot of time on Lilli’s floor, leaning up against her crib with his eyes half closed, listening to her breathing. He headed back to the kitchen to check on the pasta that he was boiling. Lilli was sat in her playpen chewing on the corners of a cardboard book. He’d have to disinfect that later, he noted.

“Smells good,” Eskild said enthusiastically -- more enthusiastically than the situation warranted. Isak raised an eyebrow at him.

“What, you want me to be honest? It smells like boiling water and canned sauce.”

“Thank you,” Isak said, straining the pasta. It was probably done.

The two of them sat down and ate slightly-undercooked pasta while Lilli babbled to herself in the playpen. She’d been feeling better today, Isak thought, her skin less hot and her sniffles farther apart.

“So I hooked up with this guy last weekend,” Eskild began conversationally, chasing a noodle around his plate, “and I think we’re going out tomorrow night.”

“Wow,” Isak said. It’d been a while since Eskild had gone out with the same guy more than once. Eskild, Isak had noticed very early on, had issues with commitment.

“He’s really sweet,” Eskild continued, “and oh my God, Isak, he gives the  _ best  _ head.”

Isak held up a hand to shut him up. Having Eskild around was kind of like having an older brother who had no limits and overshared everything. For a while, he had considered Eskild to be some kind of father-figure, and they joke about it a lot, but honestly, the role of a wild older brother fit him a lot better.

“There is a child here, Eskild,” Isak reminded him.

Eskild snorted. “You know damn well that she doesn’t understand anything yet.”

“I don’t want her first word to be ‘anal’ or something,” Isak teased back. He stood up and grabbed a bottle of wine from above the sink.

“Oh, yes please,” Eskild said. Isak poured drinks for the two of them. It was all very adult, a far cry from the days of getting wasted on shitty beer and a stranger’s vodka, and it never failed to shock Isak to think of the night he first met Eskild and how far he’d come since then. How far both of them had come, actually.

Isak only had a couple glasses, enough to make him feel comfortable and soft, and he watched as Eskild drank most of the bottle by himself. Eskild never really got blackout drunk, no matter how much he drank. He just got louder and moved his hands more when he spoke, and his eyes got brighter and his nose got redder. Isak was content to sit back and watch him as he went on about the guy he was going out with the following weekend.

Eventually, it was Lilli’s bedtime, and Eskild waved goodbye on the front porch, heading to the tram.

“Text me when you get home,” Isak called, and Eskild saluted and laughed.

He headed back inside and checked on Lilli, making sure that the baby monitor was turned on, and then he curled up in bed with the receiver of the baby monitor on his pillow, turned to full volume.

**Eskild Roommate:** home safe <3

**Baby Gay:** <3

The bed always felt huge without Even in it. Isak would curl up on his side with his knees tucked to his chest and press a pillow against his back. 

**Isak:** Can I call?

**Even:** Of course

He pulled up facetime and called Even, smiling without meaning to as the call connected and Even’s face was on his screen. 

Even was laying in bed wearing his glasses, something he only did when he was working late, and Isak frowned.

“What are you working on tonight?” he asked.

Even shifted away from the camera for a second and then returned. “Just brainstorming some changes,” he answered. 

“Don’t stay up too late, yeah?” Isak said. It was his job to worry about Even.

“I won’t, baby, How’s Lil?”

“Getting better.”

The two of them breathed in silence for a few seconds and it made the room feel a bit less empty.

“Talk me to sleep?” Isak asked quietly, and Even smiled.

“Do you remember the night we got married? You got to the hotel room and just fell right into bed, still in your suit, with your right hand holding your left ring finger. You weren’t even that drunk, just overwhelmed. And you couldn’t stop smiling…”

**FRIDAY, 09:45**

Lilli was probably better enough to go back at this point, but it was Friday and Isak really didn’t want to go back to work, and it was probably better to just keep Lilli home with him until she was fully healthy, right? Right.

He fed Lilli and she ate happily. 

It was a chill day, probably one of the chillest he’d had in a while. He texted Even and Jonas, got updates on their projects and their lives, and he worked on the couch with Lilli sleeping on his chest.

It was good.

Things were going to be okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wHOAAAAA EDY UPDATING WIPS FROM LITERALLY FOREVER AGO??? IT'S MORE LIKELY THAN YOU THINK! sajkdfha anyway hope yall enjoy <3

**Author's Note:**

> yeah i'm back
> 
> anyways, this is a beast of a fic and i'm so ready to share it! just so you all know, it takes place concurrently with my other fic, [sit me still](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10712157/chapters/23731758) (yeah i'm obsessed with alliteration and the letter s. sue me.). a lot of the content crosses over, so check that out!
> 
> as always, hit me on [tumblr](https://transmikael.tumblr.com/) <3
> 
> [buy me a coffee!](https://ko-fi.com/edyish)


End file.
